SLOW YOUR ROLL GIRL.
I am completely and entirely talking to myself when I write this. I dream. I dream, a lot. I dream about beautiful moments, fairly tale situations, once upon a times, and happily ever afters. I dream about these the second I meet a guy and I am sometimes very disappointed when he pulls out a joint or his baby mamma starts calling him. It’s probably best that you get to know someone before you start counting down the days until you marry them. You do not know this guy, all you know is what he appears to be…
Now ladies, I am not saying love doesn’t exist or who you have right in front of you isn’t a completely awesome person. Love has those beautiful moments, fairy tale situations, once upon a times and happily ever afters… BUT you can’t dream about those when you first start talking to a guy. It completely clouds your judgment. Imagining what you want the date, romance, or relationship to be like instead looking at what you actually have right in front. Having your head in the clouds does not help you find true love. Maybe you’re talking to the perfect, too-good-to-be-true Mr. Right… or maybe it is really just the pizza delivery boy who knocked up your high school math teacher.
I’m exaggerating, but you get my point.
You HAVE to see a relationship for what it is, not what it could be. You HAVE to be present and appreciate what is right in front of you or you will never find that happy ending. You HAVE to not put the stakes so high about what someone could be like until you find out what they are actually like. And most importantly, you HAVE to walk away if you find yourself saying things like “It will get better,” or “He will change,” or “He’s only doing that because…” Stop making excuses for him and just live in the present. Those fairy tale moments will happen and if you are living in a world of excuses then you are just holding yourself back from something great. Don’t get me wrong, dreaming keeps your standards high, but if you looking in the clouds while actually getting to know someone you could be overlooking reality and reality could be a man with no job… no values… and nothing to offer YOU.