So it’s been a really long time since I have blogged. I got in this weird mood of “I want to delete my whole blog because I am not sure if I feel like making fun of others people anymore” but that’s when I realized how I was viewing my blog. You see I was trying to turn things into stories that they weren’t. I was trying to make drama where there wasn’t. I was trying to making something funny that just wasn’t. So yes of course I felt guilty manipulating for the sake of a funny blog post, which is entirely the wrong reason for writing in the first place.
Then I sat there pondering and wondering if this is something that I had done in the past? Was I this evil man hating women that just destroyed the reputation of boys that did not love me? The realization was very unsettling and in this moment of this self bloggery reflection I started to read old posts contemplating rewriting or deleting them. I wanted my stories to be funny and authentic and the thought of this not being true was devastating.
The more a read the more I just smiled at my awkwardness and felt like I was reunited with the real reason why I started this blog. Besides my awful grammar and occasional spelling errors, blogging was and still is a way for me to share my stories, my awkward moments, and reflect on my life and those who walk through it. The more I read the more I was knew my stories were pure and mostly made fun of myself or reflected on my own actions. And in the rare occasion that I was making fun of someone else they were usually doing something that was either slightly repugnant or a bit hilarious that it had to be turned into a post. I don’t hate men and I believe in love more than ever but my awkwardness shines through from time to time and backs me into corners and the only way out is laugher.
It’s a new year but it’s the same old me, awkward, single, and cheesing through life looking for true love. It may never find me but that won’t keep me from believing it’s out there. The process is half the fun so I will continue to share my interesting, embarrassingly horrible, and adorable moments of those who have sat in my corner. And well if you don’t want to be part of my blog then I suggest you don’t sit in my corner. 2015 here I come with new stories and tales never told!